We went to Singapore last November to have the other embryo implanted. It went well and two weeks after the procedure, our test result was positive - we were pregnant. I had mixed feelings about the entire situation though, as I wasn't too fond of my last pregnancy despite it being uneventful.

And because we're now back in Manila, I had to look for a local doctor who was familiar with IVF. Turns out, there aren't that many IVF doctors here compared to Singapore. The level of care was also quite different - basically, I prefer Dr. Kelly Loi's version of doing things.

The baby though stopped growing after five weeks, and while I felt sad that we might have lost our last chance to have another child, I also felt relieved. I am aware how lucky we were that we even had the opportunity to do this again, but it is what it is.

Back on Home Turf

The one thing I miss about Singapore is our apartment. Malls, museums, and parks can all be visited again, but not the one place we called home for four years. In the past, whenever we would go on vacation, we could not wait to get back. Now, that is no longer an option.

Hannah is also missing the only home she's ever known. Since we arrived, she would sometimes wake up in the middle of her sleep and have crying bouts where neither Earl nor I could console her. The more we talk to her or touch her, the more upset she becomes and she starts pointing towards the door.

While I'm sad that we've left, I feel worse about how our baby seems to be heartbroken. There is nothing to do though, but to wait it out and let her get used to her new surroundings.

On a more positive note, I will be spending my time window shopping for our house and updating this blog with posts from our last month in Singapore.

A Bend in the Road

Things are still up in the air, but after four wonderful years in Singapore, we might be going home.

On the one hand, I am very excited at the thought of finally being able to fix up our house. We are now thankful that we weren't able to sell it or have it rented out because it means we get to be the first to live there. Another appealing prospect is having friends and family nearby (hooray for babysitters!!!).

On the other hand, I really like Singapore as there are so many advantages to living here. It's safe, so very easy to get around (no traffic), and we get to save more. Not to mention that it's an ideal place to raise children.

So which would I prefer? I'd honestly be happy with either one.

Five Seconds of Fame

Earl is in a magazine! Okay, it's a group picture and his name is not exactly mentioned, but as the Regional Head for Learning & Development and Talent Management, he's played a part in at least three of the five highlighted achievements.

Baptism Supplier Ratings

Here's how our suppliers fared during Hannah's baptism - 10 being the highest and 1 the lowest score.

Church - Santuario de San Antonio
Price - Php 4000
Rating - 9

Pros:
Transacting with the parish office was a breeze and the baptistry was clean.

Cons:
The only baptismal candles that can be used are the ones purchased at the parish office. This wasn't really a problem, but I wasn't too fond of the color or the design.

Reception Venue - Conti's Bakeshop & Restaurant (Greenbelt)
Price - Php 55,580 or 694.75 per person (80 pax)
Rating - 5

Pros:
Both the food and venue weren't bad. The function rooms are located on the second floor and has its own toilet (two actually - separate for males and females).

Cons:
- Initially they didn't want to honor the contract. We paid the deposit in May and signed the contract for 60 guests. But when we inquired about increasing our guest list, they informed us that the original rate they quoted is no longer valid as they will be having a price increase in July. I asked them what was a signed contract for if they had no plans of honoring it? In the end, the rate for the first 60 pax stayed the same and they applied the rate increase for the additional guests.

- Terrible customer service. We had an appointment with them at 3:00 PM to check the venue and pay for the extra guests. We arrived on the dot and was met by one of their sales agents. After less than five minutes she went downstairs and WE NEVER SAW HER AGAIN. We waited for 15 minutes before checking up on her, then we asked at least four other people and either they said she was coming back or we didn't see them again too. Our event stylist was also there with us to confirm the schedule and the layout so we were both just waiting for someone to show up.

After 30 minutes, I got mad. I was able to speak to an agent named Mia to inquire on who we could talk to and she basically asked us in an exasperated tone, "What else is there to talk about?" I replied back, "A lot!"

Take note, we had an appointment. If they're so busy that they can't attend to their customers properly, then they shouldn't have confirmed.

- They wouldn't let our guests in the venue. The reception officially started at 1:00 PM but I told them during our meeting that I've asked the guests to arrive at 12:30 PM. They said okay. On the day itself, they refused to let our guests in until 1 PM. One of my friends had to convince them to open the doors.

- The food was late. One would expect that if an event starts at 1 PM then the food should be ready by then - especially since they charge a fee if we stay past 3 PM. More than 30 minutes later, they started serving the buffet but it was incomplete. They told me that the missing food will be served to the tables directly. I said that would look horrible - buffet line with at least two chafing dishes empty?

The dessert (cake slices) was also not part of the buffet, so we had guests who never got to eat as they had to leave early.

- They ran out of dessert. I asked if we could bring home the excess cake slices and I was informed that there were none. I asked how could that be when an entire table of 10 left early and didn't get to eat? To make up for it, they gave a small cake to take home.

- They assured me that the venue can accommodate 100 guests. Realistically, it can only fit a maximum of 80 people. We had less than 90 guests and they were packed liked sardines. Many people had a hard time getting in and out of their chairs especially if they were in between other tables.

- No elevator. So if your guests are in wheelchairs, you'll need to ask for help. In our case, the servers helped my aunt in going up and down the stairs.

Event Stylist - Dianne Khu Designs
Price - Php 23,000* + Php 2170 for loot bags, crew meals & signage
Rating - 8

*Inclusions:
1. Overall Theme Design Mood board, layout
2. Stage Backdrop – Flat/Tarpaulin
3. Table Decor Custom Table Numbers and Flat Placecards
4. Ceiling Décor Lanterns (max of 3 colors)
5. Manpower & Delivery

Pros:
Dianne was easy to talk to, I loved everything she did, and her rate was reasonable to boot! I'd definitely recommend her to anyone who needs an event stylist.

Cons:
She initially came up with a design that I didn't approve of and already had it printed out, but she rectified the situation beautifully. Just tell her exactly what you want and ask to see the final layout before she sends everything to the printer.

Apparently, it's her policy to only get approval for the anchor areas - the stage and/or the dessert table - the other areas (such as small printables and entrance signages) are upon request.

Photographer - Mhel Mesa Photography
Price - Php 3000
Rating - 1

Pros:
The price.

Cons:
- Most of the photos were blurred and a lot of them had weird angles (as though they were trying to follow the rule of thirds but not quite making it).

- It seems they only took pictures at the start of the reception so some of our guests were not in any of the photos.

- Mhel said that they would send the DVD with all the shots (edited and unedited) three weeks after the event which was held on December 26. Almost two months later (February 20), she said she was already uploading the photos. More than a month after the first follow up, she claims that she had "issues in life" and thus was not able to send the DVD. As of today, we have yet to hear from her.

Planning a Baptism: Photographer Search

It took me a few months to look for a photographer mostly because I could not make up my mind. Do we splurge on a more experienced supplier or settle for someone not as known?

Little People Lifestyle Photography

Mhel Mesa Photography

Rio Jones Photography

In the end, we decided that we just needed a photographer who could do a decent job of documenting the day. So when someone recommended Mhel Mesa, I was thinking that trying out a newbie might work. The photos she posted online looked good to me and her rates were definitely appealing.

Planning a Baptism: Using an Event Stylist

Since none of my friends are creative or artistic, we decided to hire someone to spruce up the reception venue. After searching online, we asked the following stylists for a quote:

DianneKhu Designs

Party Magic

Choosing DianneKhu Designs was a pretty easy decision to make. Aside from the more attractive rate, I liked her sense of aesthetic.

Planning a Baptism: An Update

Overruled by both Hannah's pediatrician and grandmother, we have postponed her baptism to the end of the year. They pointed out that a one month old baby's immune system is still quite weak and she would needlessly be exposed to so many harmful viruses. They were also not in favor of the baby taking a plane ride to Singapore (according to her doctor, it will only be safe to travel on her third month). We did feel a twinge of guilt for risking Hannah's health in favor of being together as a family, but Earl needed to go back and we didn't want to be separated for that long.

So, the baptism has been moved to December - same church but with a different reception venue. I'm pretty happy with this date change because first, we'll be getting the 11 AM time slot. Originally, we had the 4:30 PM schedule, but since it coincided with the anticipated Mass, our guests would have had a problem finding a place to park.

Second, the family reunion I envisioned will now be possible. Because we will be seeing all our relatives on Christmas Day, they will most likely inquire about our plans for the christening and we can't tell them, "Oh, it's tomorrow but you're not invited..."

The new venue is Conti's Bakeshop & Restaurant located in Greenbelt and here's the buffet menu we've decided on:

60 pax at Php 625 per head = Php 37,500

Pumpkin Soup
Buttered Vegetables
Steamed Rice
Shanghai Rolls
Chicken Pastel
Baked Salmon
Lasagna
Sans Rival
Moist Chocolate Cake
Bottomless Iced Tea or Lemonade

Powered by Formula

I feel like a failure. First, I wasn't able to give birth naturally - I was deathly afraid of being operated on and I felt that my child missed out on all the benefits of a vaginal birth.

Next, I resorted to formula milk on the third day. I had been trying to breastfeed, but noticed that her diapers were clean (no poop or pee) and she also looked desperately hungry despite my efforts. I don't know how something that's supposed to be natural can be so difficult.

Hannah is now three months old, but I haven't made much progress as she still cries even after an hour of breastfeeding. She sometimes gets satisfied, though for most the of the day, I am just the human pacifier. I've kind of given up - anyway, my husband was completely formula fed and he turned out alright (my mother-in-law found the process too painful).

I really envy those who have so much milk that they store the excess in the freezer for other people to use. The most I've ever pumped was four ounces and that was just a one time event - usually, I'm lucky to even get two ounces.

Take note that I am still taking malunggay supplements and we even hired a lactation consultant, Nona Andaya-Castillo. Nanay Nona was extremely helpful and informative (we would definitely recommend her to anyone who needs help with breastfeeding), but there's not much that can be done if mother nature isn't cooperating.

Oh, well.

Hannah Louise

Initially weighing 3.463 kilograms (or 7.63 pounds), our daughter was born via cesarean section at 4:13 PM on a Friday.

I worried about a lot of things before she arrived and the fact I wasn't able to give birth naturally made me an emotional mess. Thankfully, everything turned out well in the end and we're just so happy she's here.

Baby Registries: A Comparison

We weren't planning on signing up for a gift registry since our guest list is quite short. But a staff member of the Baby Company told me that we could save 10% on regular items if we registered.

This got me thinking, if we bought the Graco Pack 'n Play On-The-Go Playard which costs Php 7999.75, the discount would be around Php 800! Also, some of our friends have already asked us what we want for the baby so this seemed like a really great idea. In the end, we did the registry, but not at the Baby Company as their options were a bit limited compared to other stores in Manila.

Baby Company (Mall Boutique)

Pros
- For a minimum of Php 500, registrants and their guests get a 10% discount for regular items on the wish list (cash or credit card)

Cons
- There are only a few branches - four (4) in Manila and one (1) in Cebu
- Toiletries and diapers are not included in the discount
- Only the guests get SM Advantage points

Mothercare

Pros
- Has a wider range of items to choose from including nursery furniture

Cons
- No discount for either the registrants or their guests

SM Store

Pros
- Registrants and their guests get a 10% discount for regular items on the wish list (cash or credit card)
- Registrants get a 10% discount on any regular item within the SM Store (including the in-store Baby Company outlets) for a month before the event date
- Bonus SM Advantage points for the registrants from guests' purchases
- Free delivery service to one destination within city limits
- You can view and manage your wish list online
- Free specialized wrapping service

Cons
- Personally, I find that the items here are more basic especially when it comes to clothing - I prefer the style selections at Rustan's and Mothercare

Rustan's

Pros
- Registrants and their guests get a 10% discount for regular items on the wish list (cash or debit card)
- Registrants get a 10% discount on any regular item within the Children's Section for a month before the event date

Cons
- Discount not applicable to credit card purchases
- Discount for registrant not applicable to the other areas of the store except at the Children's Section

Planning a Baptism: The Reception

A huge family reunion was what I had in mind when it came to the baptism of our first child. Earl though had other ideas and my entire family backed him up instead of me. As my sister pointed out, there were less than ten people at my baptism including my parents.

Earl has to return to Singapore by March 28 and as much as possible, he doesn't want to go back without us. My husband thinks that if we have too many guests, it will be difficult to coordinate and he wants our daughter baptized before we board any form of aircraft. He also pointed out that the money we save at the baptism can be used to furnish and decorate our new apartment (we plan to move to a bigger place by June).

So, there will only be around 20 guests in attendance comprising of our immediate family members, the priest, and our closest friends (some of whom are also the godparents).

With the Church and the guest list settled, it was now time to search for a reception venue. We needed a small function room that can accommodate a maximum of 25 people, has ample parking space, and is easy to locate. But most of all, we should like the food being served.

Here's our short list:

Chateau 1771
- Minimum guarantee: Php 20,000 consumable
- Deposit requirement: None unless you order food in advance
- Inclusions: None
- Notes: Maximum 20 pax, sit down only no buffet set-up

Circles Event Café
- Rate: Php 1800 per person with taxes and service charge
- Minimum guarantee: 30 pax or Php 50,000 (if you have less than 30 guests, then the difference can be used towards drinks)
- Deposit requirement: 50% two weeks in advance
- Inclusions: one round of coffee or tea

Niu
- Rate: Php 1457.40 per person with taxes and service charge
- Minimum guarantee: 20 pax
- Deposit requirement: None but one person has to be there before 12 Noon otherwise the reservation is cancelled
- Inclusions: Unlimited drinks including house wine and fruit shakes
- Notes: Maximum 24 pax in the Norway and Denmark function rooms when combined

Sentro 1771
- Minimum guarantee: Php 10,000 (11 AM to 2PM) or Php 16,000 (1 PM to 4 PM)
- Deposit requirement: None unless you order food in advance
- Inclusions: None
- Notes: Room is good for three hours, charge of Php 1000 (consumable) for every excess hour. Corkage fee applies to outside cake and alcoholic drinks. Maximum room capacity is 25 pax.

Italianni's
- Minimum guarantee: Php 20,000 consumable
- Deposit requirement: None unless you order food in advance
- Inclusions: None
- Notes: Room is good for three hours, charge of Php 1500 (non-consumable) for every excess hour. No corkage fee for bringing your own cake. Maximum room capacity is 35 pax.

Earl did not like the first three on the list and when he saw a picture of Sentro's function room, he immediately asked, "No windows?" We then did an ocular and he said it reminded him of a very cramped office conference room. I had also considered Conti's but they're fully booked on our chosen date, and parking could be a problem over at Milkyway Café.

I was starting to run out of ideas when we walked by Italianni's in Bonifacio High Street and on a whim, I decided to stop and ask if they had a function room. The lady said yes, we took a look, and my husband declared the reception venue search to be over. He liked that the place was not only bigger, but also brighter.

Planning a Baptism: Finding a Church

Santuario de San Antonio Parish

A bit of panic ensued when we found out that due to a decree by the Catholic Archdiocese in 2011, parishes can only baptize residents within the boundary of the church's assigned area.

What this means is that a baby can only be baptized at the nearest church where the family resides. Since we are currently staying in Alabang Hills Village, the closest one is Sacred Heart of Jesus Parish in Hillsborough Village. I attended a public baptism there once and found it to be quite chaotic. They give a short talk for the godparents on their duties before the ceremony and the lady who conducted it sounded like she was selling fish at the wet market. Unfortunately, they do not offer solo or private baptisms.

My sister and I both had private baptisms and I find that this is more solemn than the public version where all you think of is getting out of there as quickly as possible due to how crowded the place can get.

You could have your baptism elsewhere provided you can obtain a permission letter, but they refused to give one as they advised they are not allowed to give such letters out. My question is, if priests are banned from issuing permit letters, then why is it even listed as an option? Why not just dictate outright that people don't have a choice?

Luckily for us, if you are based abroad, you can skip this requirement and have the freedom to choose your own baptism venue. In our case, we decided on Santuario de San Antonio as they have their own baptistery (see photo below), it's easy to get to (especially for the godparents who all live north of Manila), and there are many restaurants nearby for the reception.

Other venues we considered were Our Lady of the Pillar Parish Church and St. James the Great Parish, but both do not offer private baptisms. St. Alphonsus Mary de Liguori Parish in Magallanes does, but our guests would have to make a u-turn on the South Luzon Expressway just to get back to Makati (if I remember correctly). The National Shrine of the Sacred Heart also provides solo baptisms but the place is not that easy to locate especially if you're unfamiliar with the area.

Reservation Requirements:

1. Photocopy of Birth Certificate
2. Permission letter from your respective parish
3. List of names of godparents (maximum of 5 pairs)
4. Completed Baptismal Form
5. Non-refundable contribution of Php 4000

It is stated on their website that the requirements must be complete before you can make a reservation. But Edna, the lady in-charge, allowed us to just pay the fee and submit the baptismal form first when we explained that we have to return to Singapore as soon as possible (thus the need to plan everything in advance). They allow for a date change as long as the schedule you want is available.

We will be bringing our own priest, Rev. Msgr. Vicente Bauson, who also happens to be a family friend and the one who married us.

Update: It turns out that only our parish priest was problematic. I have a friend who lives in Pasig and she was able to get a permission letter quite easily for her son's baptism.

Thoughts to Ponder

It seems my doctor favors cesarean sections. I had a routine ultrasound to check the state of the baby and I was advised that she's too large. At 36 weeks and 3 days, our little girl is in frank breech position, weighing an estimated 7 pounds and 11 ounces with fetal biometry at 38 weeks and 5 days. The ultrasonologist (who also happens to be my doctor's husband), told me that it's quite rare for the baby to turn at this late stage.

When Dr. Aina Sales Diaz looked at the results of the scan, she advised that I should have myself checked again after a week and if the baby has not flipped over to the vertex position by February 18, then I can have the cesarean section done two days later. She did not suggest other options.

I decided to do a bit of research and came up with the following:

1. Ultrasounds are usually inaccurate and are off by 1 or 2 pounds. Many women who were told that they will have 9 to 12 pound babies found that the actual weight at the time of birth was around 6 to 8 pounds.

2. Those who were also measuring a few weeks in advance (fetal biometry), were able to deliver normally as their baby turned at 39 weeks or right before their scheduled operations.

3. Most were advised to try for vaginal delivery first as an emergency cesarean section can easily be done if the baby is too big or still in breech at the time of actual labour.

Earl and I have agreed to wait it out for as long as possible before undergoing surgery, so now I'm trying to decide if I should still do the ultrasound or defer it to a later date?

Other things we need to consider:

We're almost done with shopping for the baby, but there are some items we can't seem to decide on. For example, where will the baby sleep? We plan to buy a crib in Singapore (the type that converts to a toddler bed), but for the few weeks we'll be in Manila, where will we place our newborn? I was thinking of the Graco Pack 'n Play® On The Go™ Playard. but it doesn't look too comfortable.

Another concern is should we buy a stroller? I can understand how it might not be needed here in Manila as there are a lot of people who can help with the baby - relatives, nanny, etc. But since we're based in Singapore where we don't have a car or household help, would a stroller be worth investing into? We'll need one that's suitable for a newborn and can easily be folded with just one hand. Also, which brand? We don't mind paying a bit more if it can last until our second child.

Maybe it's better to opt for a baby sling instead and buy the stroller when she's a little older? The problem is that I find them complicated and I'm not really sure how safe they are for newborns.

Are maternity binders necessary? I have yet to find a cheap one - though I've noticed that with anything baby-related, the price seems to skyrocket.

Decisions, decisions.

Coming Soon!

As of today, we have exactly five weeks left before the baby's estimated March 8 due date. But I'm hoping she'll be a little early and show up at least week 37 or 38. It's hard to sleep and move around - even walking has to be done very slowly and the slightest road incline feels like I've run a marathon. Oh, and my doctor has placed me on a diet (no dessert until after I give birth).

I've been pretty lucky though as my biggest complaint thus far has been the fact I can't have anything sweet. I'm currently in Manila and it's like I want to eat everything! There really is no place like home when it comes to food. I've also been able to drive around on my own except to areas that Earl has deemed far (my husband's version of "far" is any place that's at least 20 minutes away by car).

Another update is that we've settled on a local doctor, Dr. Aina Sales-Diaz, who was referred to us by my cousin (they were classmates in med school). One thing that did give me pause was that with the two doctors I consulted with, both automatically assumed I would be undergoing a cesarean section just because we went through IVF. It's a good thing I had checked with Dr. Kelly Loi before leaving Singapore and she said normal delivery is an option (provided the baby won't get too big - thus the diet).

Lastly, I'm almost done with shopping for both myself and the baby. Hopefully by this week, I will be able to start packing my hospital bag.

Life Happened

Arriving in 2015:

Maybe it's the nausea, but I barely have enough energy to turn on the computer these days and it doesn't help that I'm always sleepy. I've been pretty lucky though that I have yet to actually throw up.

Speaking of luck, the fact that we're even pregnant is a blessing. This baby was courtesy of a very long, painful, and expensive process called in vitro fertilisation (IVF). Though to be honest, I was initially resentful that we needed to go through all this trouble when so many people are dumping their offspring in garbage cans. I had to constantly remind myself to be thankful we're able to afford this procedure and that it resulted in a positive outcome on our first try.

Note: We've decided to skip the down syndrome test as we're having this baby no matter what happens.

Now that we're on our second trimester, I've started to become very excited! I'm already mentally planning the baptism and the first birthday party. I am aware that it's still too early to prepare for the baby, but first on the list will be to find a bigger apartment. Also, we plan to give birth in Manila as it will be way too costly to do it here in Singapore. It's a good thing Earl's boss has kindly allowed him to be based in the Philippines for three months so he doesn't have to shuttle back and forth too often.

Second on my list is to travel before the baby arrives. Of course, I have to be mindful of our budget and the baby (can't get too stressed), but so far we've arranged to go to Los Angeles this month and New Zealand in November. We used Earl's miles for both flights so the tickets were a bargain.

As for this blog, things will get a little quiet from time to time as currently, all I want to do is nap.